This is my confession

It’s time I let you in on a secret. I have never watched “Fixer Upper” with Chip and Joanna Gaines. It should be a show I would love, but I just don’t want to watch it. To be honest, it stresses me out.

We have a beautiful farm house that is a designer’s dream. My Pinterest board is brimming with ideas. But I am frozen like a deer in a headlight, and I have never been this way.

In the past, Michael and I would go to Lowes, pick up a few cans of paints we both agreed would be ok for our house and that would be it. But I am overwhelmed on what to do with the new house. 

Enjoy some photos of the house. Please tell me your ideas. And if you would happen to run into the Gaines - send them my way, and I will pretend to be their biggest fan while they redo my house for me. 

I would like to redo the entire kitchen. The walls are textured so they need to be smoothed. 

Gorgeous windows let the light in .

Kitchen leads into the dining room. 

My favorite piece of furniture. The previous owner left it there. This will go in the dining room. 

Laundry room.

Laundry room. Cute picture of my mom sitting on my dad's lap. Look I am wearing a romper. I basically look 5. 

This dining room had layers of wallpaper on it. I will tell you about it on my next post. 

This is the one room we've been working on. 

This will be the fancy living room. Look at the fireplace!

The house is full of original pieces like this door and check out the doorknob. 

I want to get a huge canvas and place it here. 

The girls love the doorbell. 

Seriously, I'm not buying Christmas presents. I'll tell them to go play with the doorbell. 

The family room, don't pay attention to the man on the chair. 

Man cave/workout room

View from the second floor. This looks like a painting. 

This is a landing between the bedrooms. We are going to make it a library. 

Abby's room.

Whoever painted the murals is very talented. But it's not really my taste  so they will go. 

Another mural in Madi's room.Why doesn't the giraffe have pants?

A big shout out to Heidi Perry for taking these photos. 

July Fourth Shin Dig

Get crunked up, get crunked up. Not really – it was a family party.

Michael started working on the chickens at 7 a.m. He is serious about meat. His brine includes vinegar, salt, garlic, oranges, pepper and sugar. It makes the chicken taste so flavorful. I think Bobby Flay might be jealous.

My contribution was chili cheese dip, which is cream cheese, chili and cheese. Simple and elegant, I know. But the crowd always goes wild for it.

120 water balloons, hundreds of dollars of fireworks and a slip-n-slide. We were ready!

Abby enjoying the slip-n-slide.

Everyone arrived and brought a dish to share. Some of the favorites included a cookie dough dip, corn salad and the chicken. Seriously, the chicken tasted like it came from a famous person’s bbq restaurant. The kid’s favorite was a blue noodle salad with red peppers and white chunks of cheese. God bless America!

Michael's famous chicken. 

The kids went crazy for the patriotic noodle salad. Notice my chili cheese dip?

I recruited my friend Kathryn to help me fill the water balloons. The water source is in the barn. I figured we could handle it – righty tighty, lefty loosey right? It was an old fashion pump! I had to use my body weight to pump it. (I won’t need my Y membership since I am going to get ripped living on a farm.) 

Madi earning her farm muscles while filling up water balloons. 

I’m sure you’ve seen the commercial for the water balloons you can fill in 60 seconds. It’s a pretty simple concept, but with the way the pump was attached to the wall the task was way more difficult than it should be. In the end, I managed to soak Kathryn.

Sorry friend. But thanks for your help filling up the balloons!

Whoops. But the balloons were filled.

Mass chaos ensued while I tried to organize 20 little kids. Thanks to Eric Becker (aka Drinks aka Mr. Frinks) for the help!

Classic water balloon toss.

Kids were running around the farm, men were playing corn hole, women were chatting and a bonfire had been started – it was a Norman Rockwell painting in the making.

I am curious if anyone completed a game. Several of the children would run by and steal the bean bags. 

As it got dark, we lit sparklers, threw snaps and pulled the confetti poppers. No one was injured, a small miracle.

Adult supervision of course. Safety first!

Then the men showed their American spirit by lighting fireworks. Again no injuries. But so many giggles. Not from the children mind you, from the men. Why is fire so exciting?

Our own personal fireworks show. 

Michael and I had so much fun. I can see this as a yearly tradition. But I need some better water balloon games. Any ideas?

Fun but exhausted after our party. 

From the Farmer

The family, including our dog Bailey. Photo by Heather Welch.

I grew up all over thanks to my father’s air force career. But wherever we were my mom always had some sort of garden.

One of my earliest memories was chasing rabbits out of one of my mom’s vegetable garden and she stepped out the back door and shot a running rabbit with a pellet gun at about 25 yards. The animal dropped mid jump.

Growing things is in my blood. My granddaddy had a farm in central Georgia. My other set of grandparents have had a jungle of a garden for as long as I can remember (and some of the best blueberries).

My grandaddy

There are generations of growers in my family. I also have generations of military service in my family. I am talking back to the Revolutionary War. (I feel like LT Dan in Forrest Gump when he describes his family).

I always wanted to be in the military, and I was. My time as a Navy corpsman was fantastic. I had it a lot easier than most but still experienced some very hard times. But I loved every minute of it. 

Coming back home after deployment in Iraq. Photo by Michael Smith. 

I did have troubles adjusting to civilian life and still do – just like a lot of my generation. I floated from job to job since I have been officially out and finished with college since 2010. I was searching for something more. Something to give me meaning. Something bigger than me. Something to be proud of. I have found that in this farm! It’s bigger than me. The farm is something I am proud to call mine. It’s a pride I have not felt since I put on a uniform. I love taking a head of lettuce or a bag of tomatoes and cucumbers to someone and their eyes light up with joy over something I did, I made. It’s how I want my daughters to grow up, giving to others. I want to feed the world with fresh, clean food. (Well maybe I’ll start with my family).

Luckily the farm already has some fruit trees and bushes. Photo by Heather Welch. 

PS- I want to give a shout out to the East Tennessee RC&D and the UT Extension for the support and the wonderful beginner farming class I took. If you are a farmer or thinking about farming take this class.

Picking blueberries. Photo by Heather Welch.

Ingenuity for the win with a side of critter curbuffle

Farm chores. Farm chores. (Sing it like Wayne’s World.)

It was time to teach the girls hard work.

I donned a bathing suit and shorts because Mama didn’t want weird tan lines. The girls dressed up too. Skirts, sparkles and flip flops for the win. (Think Fancy Nancy, if you’ve ever read those books.)

Fancy Nancy herself

Who doesn't wear a bathing suit for yard work?

My goal was to trim the hedges.

I felt like a bad mama jamma as I used the power tools. But with great power comes great  mess – specifically, with the leaves.

The girls and I went to the barn to look for a wheelbarrow. Shelves and shelves of tools, but no wheelbarrow. Isn’t the wheelbarrow the emblem of quaint family farming?

I racked my brain but couldn’t think of a solution, apart from hoping the leaves would just blow away. Then Madi said, “Let’s use this.”

All crinkled up and in the corner was an old trash bag. It had a small hole in it, but we were able to put all the twigs and branches in it. I was so proud of her for her problem solving techniques especially when I was getting ready to give up.

Smart, hard working girls

During the farm chores – but after Madi used her smarts – something happened.

While I was minding my business and trimming trees, something furry flew out of the hedge.

“I just decapitated a mouse,” was my first thought.

I looked closer.

Yep, it looked like a dead mouse.

But then, its leg started twitching. I screamed, but Madi started putting gloves on and said she would handle it. She’s five… my five-year-old was going to handle a headless mouse like a boss.

I kiboshed that. All of a sudden, the mouse got up and started walking around. I guess I didn’t kill it. Just stunned it. Whew!

He escaped death this time!

Michael came over and then informed me it wasn’t a mouse at all. It was a vole. Excuse me. Guess I will get to know all my rodents living out there.

Learning about the critter.

Another crisis adverted. And we managed to get a ton done. Mowing, hedge trimming and mulch laid!

Putting the girls to work.

Such amazing flowers.

There are so many roses on the property.

These smelled great.

It was so hot.

After dealing with the vole. I was done trimming bushes. Photo by Abby Ryals.

A piece of paradise

The Beach Boys said paradise was a state of mind.

Jimmy Buffet sang “Cheeseburger in Paradise.” (Did you just sing, I like mine with lettuce and tomato. I did.)

And Green Day’s take on paradise was when they moved out of their parent’s house and wrote the song “Welcome to Paradise.”

Everyone has their ideas of what paradise is and mine is now the farm.

True, it doesn’t have palm trees and waiters bringing drinks with little umbrellas. But when I go there it’s exciting and makes me think about the future.

We love the farm. It's such a fun, exciting place. Photo by Heather Welch.

The farm is really a tranquil place with 60 plus acres and consists of a house, barn, chicken coop, well house, dairy and several pastures. It also has woods and a big mountain we hope to explore in the fall and winter months. There is one part of the property we call shale hill. It’s seriously a big hill made of shale.  (Say shale hill 3 times fast.)

Here are  photos to give you a tour.

A pasture ready for some animals. Photo by Heather Welch.

Party barn! Not really, Michael wants to actually use it for farming. Photo by Heather Welch.

Fancy water spigot. I hope to gain muscles using it. Photo by Heather Welch. 

So pretty. The farm is full of flowers. God give me a green thumb! Photo by Heather Welch.

The house. Anyone have an in with HGTV? I need help! Photo by Heather Welch.

Another barn view. Photo by Heather Welch.

The girls love finding treasures in the barn. Photo by Heidi Perry.

A field, perfect for impromptu photo shoots. Photo by Heidi Perry.

Another great spot for photos and of course, keeping animals in.  Photo by Heather Welch.

The view from the top of the pasture. Photo by Heidi Perry.

There are fruit trees, including apples, peaches, pears and cherries. Photo by Heather Welch.

More flowers. Photo by Heather Welch.

These are my favorites. Photo by Heather Welch.